everything to be started anew,but somethings couldnt be changed...

i realised i've given up alreadyy..

ookies...loong time since i wrote...

i use to share one...but for personal reasons...i stopped.

and nows...lets begin with some small details bout meh.(not like yoo even car3)

name: joie

date of birth: 03th july

place of birth: SINGAPORE

status: in a relantionship...

<<<<>

anymore...yoo can jus ask me....jus open ur mouth..
iie could be very mean and nasty if you pissed me off..

ands if you hate me then iiem sorry iie cant be perfect......
but then again why should i try to please someone(you)?


- Updated at 2.36am -

lets start wit MY SAD STORY...my complicated relationship
i finally realised what he had always wanted when i was looking and thinking through the conversations between us.but it was all tooo late...He just wanted us to spend more time tgt...But yea,im kinda the type who wud usually hang out more wit MY frens and not my bf...whos MORE IMPORTANT??? idk thou... but i just wanted to know one thing though .. what the hell happen?! whats the reason for this ending? i haf so so many questions,i want to know what's everything,but he not mine anymore...never ever...i shouldnt be thinking bout him at all.its not fair to A.T.

but it just wouldnt changed the fact that he had hurt me...i want to noe the reason for the breakup...im not being despo but its just that i feel that i have the right to noe...i dont care if its just becoz he haf a new gf or wadd...i want to noe if it was or wasnt my fault, for the breakup...


im really really confused, idk whether i still like him...im tgt wit A.T. and really happy too...but everytime i see or remember sumthing bout him...i wud feel like jus curling up and scream, it was like sumthing breaking inside of me, i jus couldnt breathe, i shouldnt be feeling this way...but maybe it was becoz it reopen the old wound deep inside of me, the wound that was concealed frm everyone eyes, that i haf to pretend that everything ish alright, smile like nothing happen and live like it nvr hurt me...

ever since he broke me, i have been having endless dreams bout the bad incident that affected me much...that i took 8mths to recover frm the shock, but i could never heal completely again, its just like a broken mirror, once broken no matter how yoo fixed it,the cracks will never disappear...the pain was still there,but wen i met him,it got lesser,but the pain was still there...i could feel it i dont tink he noe how much i was suffering...the pain, i made me feel like i could die frm it...he thot he was always there for me, he thot i had gotten over it but hes wrong...

i told him the sad story, the incident that happened... but i dont tink he cared enough or its just tht i had been deceiving myself that he would even care...he just never felt the pain that i was suffering frm, the cuts that i hid frm him, never seen that side that was only known to...me

he used to always want to noe why i even cared for him...but mie reason was simple..."it's because you are my friend"

i still see him, in school,outside of school,its really sad that we became strangers who WERE once in a relationship thinking that NOTHING could break us up, ...and also especially wen my frens asked me why i had suddenly turned pale and walked the other way..just not to see or even pass by him, and if i know him, but all i could say ish i knew him once....


yeah, so comment, talk to me whatever dont worry I dont bite! ii would'nt give a crap of what you think of me,but I can be really friendly if you get to know me.
muacks:)



I Told You That I Loved You. You Once Told Me So As Well. You Say It Doesnt Matter Anymore. It Would Never Work. You Found A New Love. You Dropped It All And Walk Away. Leaving Me To Pick Up The Pieces. You Crushed My Heart In Your Hands. You Laughed At Me. You Thought I Was Pathetic.